9 April 1957
Today is Nancy’s birthday. She is 13 – a brand-new teenager! Dressed up in her pale lavender skirt and white ruffled blouse, she looked like a breath of spring even though outdoors we have the heavy snow still on the ground and weighing down tree branches. Suburban schools aplenty are shut down because of the snow from the blizzard fall which started Sunday and continued through yesterday.
Sunday, we celebrated the joint birthdays – Kurt will be 40 on Thursday. The folks, Eva, Aunt Roser, Margaret, Bill Klein, and Blanche spent all afternoon and evening with us.
Me? I’m at sixes and sevens. My eyes feel funny and my aches have returned in recent weeks. I need a checkup, some new glasses, and my bridges back in shape again after having two teeth pulled.
Mrs. Gorzyinski died last Wednesday. Kurt and I attended her funeral Saturday. I feel blank after having the old hurts prodded. I seem to be struggling for sturdier ground. I have the feeling that after this lethargy and this blank feeling passes, all will be better than before. Right now, my mind is at a standstill. I just cannot get my bearings. I’m quite uncertain about which way to direct my attention. So, I just unthinkingly go on from one task to another, feeling all the while my whole personality is heavy with inertia. I could just sit during doing nothing with an empty mind.